Movie: Lord of the Rings
Snarky summary: Group spends 9 hours returning jewlery

Movie: The Revenant
Snarky summary: Leonardo DiCaprio wanders a frozen wasteland looking for an Oscar

Movie: The Departed
Snarky summary: Spied upon! Spied upon! We're always spied upon. "Yes, but who the hell is doing the spying?"

Movie: Avatar
Snarky summary: Obnoxious blue aliens fuck up nature

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