SCENE IV. OLIVIA's garden. Twelfth Night  Shakespeare homepage  |  Twelfth Night  | Act 3, Scene 4 

 Previous scene  |  Next scene  SCENE IV. OLIVIA's garden. 

 Enter OLIVIA and MARIA  OLIVIA  I have sent after him: he says he'll come; 

 How shall I feast him? what bestow of him? 

 For youth is bought more oft than begg'd or borrow'd. 

 I speak too loud. 

 Where is Malvolio? he is sad and civil, 

 And suits well for a servant with my fortunes: 

 Where is Malvolio? 

 MARIA  He's coming, madam; but in very strange manner. He 

 is, sure, possessed, madam. 

 OLIVIA  Why, what's the matter? does he rave? 

 MARIA  No. madam, he does nothing but smile: your 

 ladyship were best to have some guard about you, if 

 he come; for, sure, the man is tainted in's wits. 

 OLIVIA  Go call him hither. 



 Exit MARIA  I am as mad as he, 

 If sad and merry madness equal be. 



 Re-enter MARIA, with MALVOLIO  How now, Malvolio! 

 MALVOLIO  Sweet lady, ho, ho. 

 OLIVIA  Smilest thou? 

 I sent for thee upon a sad occasion. 

 MALVOLIO  Sad, lady! I could be sad: this does make some 

 obstruction in the blood, this cross-gartering; but 

 what of that? if it please the eye of one, it is 

 with me as the very true sonnet is, 'Please one, and 

 please all.' 

 OLIVIA  Why, how dost thou, man? what is the matter with thee? 

 MALVOLIO  Not black in my mind, though yellow in my legs. It 

 did come to his hands, and commands shall be 

 executed: I think we do know the sweet Roman hand. 

 OLIVIA  Wilt thou go to bed, Malvolio? 

 MALVOLIO  To bed! ay, sweet-heart, and I'll come to thee. 

 OLIVIA  God comfort thee! Why dost thou smile so and kiss 

 thy hand so oft? 

 MARIA  How do you, Malvolio? 

 MALVOLIO  At your request! yes; nightingales answer daws. 

 MARIA  Why appear you with this ridiculous boldness before my lady? 

 MALVOLIO  'Be not afraid of greatness:' 'twas well writ. 

 OLIVIA  What meanest thou by that, Malvolio? 

 MALVOLIO  'Some are born great,'-- 

 OLIVIA  Ha! 

 MALVOLIO  'Some achieve greatness,'-- 

 OLIVIA  What sayest thou? 

 MALVOLIO  'And some have greatness thrust upon them.' 

 OLIVIA  Heaven restore thee! 

 MALVOLIO  'Remember who commended thy yellow stocking s,'-- 

 OLIVIA  Thy yellow stockings! 

 MALVOLIO  'And wished to see thee cross-gartered.' 

 OLIVIA  Cross-gartered! 

 MALVOLIO  'Go to thou art made, if thou desirest to be so;'-- 

 OLIVIA  Am I made? 

 MALVOLIO  'If not, let me see thee a servant still.' 

 OLIVIA  Why, this is very midsummer madness. 



 Enter Servant  Servant  Madam, the young gentleman of the Count Orsino's is 

 returned: I could hardly entreat him back: he 

 attends your ladyship's pleasure. 

 OLIVIA  I'll come to him. 



 Exit Servant  Good Maria, let this fellow be looked to. Where's 

 my cousin Toby? Let some of my people have a special 

 care of him: I would not have him miscarry for the 

 half of my dowry. 



 Exeunt OLIVIA and MARIA  MALVOLIO  O, ho! do you come near me now? no worse man than 

 Sir Toby to look to me! This concurs directly with 

 the letter: she sends him on purpose, that I may 

 appear stubborn to him; for she incites me to that 

 in the letter. 'Cast thy humble slough,' says she; 

 'be opposite with a kinsman, surly with servants; 

 let thy tongue tang with arguments of state; put 

 thyself into the trick of singularity;' and 

 consequently sets down the manner how; as, a sad 

 face, a reverend carriage, a slow tongue, in the 

 habit of some sir of note, and so forth. I have 

 limed her; but it is Jove's doing, and Jove make me 

 thankful! And when she went away now, 'Let this 

 fellow be looked to:' fellow! not Malvolio, nor 

 after my degree, but fellow. Why, every thing 

 adheres together, that no dram of a scruple, no 

 scruple of a scruple, no obstacle, no incredulous 

 or unsafe circumstance--What can be said? Nothing 

 that can be can come between me and the full 

 prospect of my hopes. Well, Jove, not I, is the 

 doer of this, and he is to be thanked. 



 Re-enter MARIA, with SIR TOBY BELCH and FABIAN  SIR TOBY BELCH  Which way is he, in the name of sanctity? If all 

 the devils of hell be drawn in little, and Legion 

 himself possessed him, yet I'll speak to him. 

 FABIAN  Here he is, here he is. How is't with you, sir? 

 how is't with you, man? 

 MALVOLIO  Go off; I discard you: let me enjoy my private: go 

 off. 

 MARIA  Lo, how hollow the fiend speaks within him! did not 

 I tell you? Sir Toby, my lady prays you to have a 

 care of him. 

 MALVOLIO  Ah, ha! does she so? 

 SIR TOBY BELCH  Go to, go to; peace, peace; we must deal gently 

 with him: let me alone. How do you, Malvolio? how 

 is't with you? What, man! defy the devil: 

 consider, he's an enemy to mankind. 

 MALVOLIO  Do you know what you say? 

 MARIA  La you, an you speak ill of the devil, how he takes 

 it at heart! Pray God, he be not bewitched! 

 FABIAN  Carry his water to the wise woman. 

 MARIA  Marry, and it shall be done to-morrow morning, if I 

 live. My lady would not lose him for more than I'll say. 

 MALVOLIO  How now, mistress! 

 MARIA  O Lord! 

 SIR TOBY BELCH  Prithee, hold thy peace; this is not the way: do 

 you not see you move him? let me alone with him. 

 FABIAN  No way but gentleness; gently, gently: the fiend is 

 rough, and will not be roughly used. 

 SIR TOBY BELCH  Why, how now, my bawcock! how dost thou, chuck? 

 MALVOLIO  Sir! 

 SIR TOBY BELCH  Ay, Biddy, come with me. What, man! 'tis not for 

 gravity to play at cherry-pit with Satan: hang 

 him, foul collier! 

 MARIA  Get him to say his prayers, good Sir Toby, get him to pray. 

 MALVOLIO  My prayers, minx! 

 MARIA  No, I warrant you, he will not hear of godliness. 

 MALVOLIO  Go, hang yourselves all! you are idle shallow 

 things: I am not of your element: you shall know 

 more hereafter. 



 Exit  SIR TOBY BELCH  Is't possible? 

 FABIAN  If this were played upon a stage now, I could 

 condemn it as an improbable fiction. 

 SIR TOBY BELCH  His very genius hath taken the infection of the device, man. 

 MARIA  Nay, pursue him now, lest the device take air and taint. 

 FABIAN  Why, we shall make him mad indeed. 

 MARIA  The house will be the quieter. 

 SIR TOBY BELCH  Come, we'll have him in a dark room and bound. My 

 niece is already in the belief that he's mad: we 

 may carry it thus, for our pleasure and his penance, 

 till our very pastime, tired out of breath, prompt 

 us to have mercy on him: at which time we will 

 bring the device to the bar and crown thee for a 

 finder of madmen. But see, but see. 



 Enter SIR ANDREW  FABIAN  More matter for a May morning. 

 SIR ANDREW  Here's the challenge, read it: warrant there's 

 vinegar and pepper in't. 

 FABIAN  Is't so saucy? 

 SIR ANDREW  Ay, is't, I warrant him: do but read. 

 SIR TOBY BELCH  Give me. 



 Reads  'Youth, whatsoever thou art, thou art but a scurvy fellow.' 

 FABIAN  Good, and valiant. 

 SIR TOBY BELCH  [Reads]  'Wonder not, nor admire not in thy mind, 

 why I do call thee so, for I will show thee no reason for't.' 

 FABIAN  A good note; that keeps you from the blow of the law. 

 SIR TOBY BELCH  [Reads]  'Thou comest to the lady Olivia, and in my 

 sight she uses thee kindly: but thou liest in thy 

 throat; that is not the matter I challenge thee for.' 

 FABIAN  Very brief, and to exceeding good sense--less. 

 SIR TOBY BELCH  [Reads]  'I will waylay thee going home; where if it 

 be thy chance to kill me,'-- 

 FABIAN  Good. 

 SIR TOBY BELCH  [Reads]  'Thou killest me like a rogue and a villain.' 

 FABIAN  Still you keep o' the windy side of the law: good. 

 SIR TOBY BELCH  [Reads]  'Fare thee well; and God have mercy upon 

 one of our souls! He may have mercy upon mine; but 

 my hope is better, and so look to thyself. Thy 

 friend, as thou usest him, and thy sworn enemy, 

 ANDREW AGUECHEEK. 

 If this letter move him not, his legs cannot: 

 I'll give't him. 

 MARIA  You may have very fit occasion for't: he is now in 

 some commerce with my lady, and will by and by depart. 

 SIR TOBY BELCH  Go, Sir Andrew: scout me for him at the corner the 

 orchard like a bum-baily: so soon as ever thou seest 

 him, draw; and, as thou drawest swear horrible; for 

 it comes to pass oft that a terrible oath, with a 

 swaggering accent sharply twanged off, gives manhood 

 more approbation than ever proof itself would have 

 earned him. Away! 

 SIR ANDREW  Nay, let me alone for swearing. 



 Exit  SIR TOBY BELCH  Now will not I deliver his letter: for the behavior 

 of the young gentleman gives him out to be of good 

 capacity and breeding; his employment between his 

 lord and my niece confirms no less: therefore this 

 letter, being so excellently ignorant, will breed no 

 terror in the youth: he will find it comes from a 

 clodpole. But, sir, I will deliver his challenge by 

 word of mouth; set upon Aguecheek a notable report 

 of valour; and drive the gentleman, as I know his 

 youth will aptly receive it, into a most hideous 

 opinion of his rage, skill, fury and impetuosity. 

 This will so fright them both that they will kill 

 one another by the look, like cockatrices. 



 Re-enter OLIVIA, with VIOLA  FABIAN  Here he comes with your niece: give them way till 

 he take leave, and presently after him. 

 SIR TOBY BELCH  I will meditate the while upon some horrid message 

 for a challenge. 



 Exeunt SIR TOBY BELCH, FABIAN, and MARIA  OLIVIA  I have said too much unto a heart of stone 

 And laid mine honour too unchary out: 

 There's something in me that reproves my fault; 

 But such a headstrong potent fault it is, 

 That it but mocks reproof. 

 VIOLA  With the same 'havior that your passion bears 

 Goes on my master's grief. 

 OLIVIA  Here, wear this jewel for me, 'tis my picture; 

 Refuse it not; it hath no tongue to vex you; 

 And I beseech you come again to-morrow. 

 What shall you ask of me that I'll deny, 

 That honour saved may upon asking give? 

 VIOLA  Nothing but this; your true love for my master. 

 OLIVIA  How with mine honour may I give him that 

 Which I have given to you? 

 VIOLA  I will acquit you. 

 OLIVIA  Well, come again to-morrow: fare thee well: 

 A fiend like thee might bear my soul to hell. 



 Exit 

 Re-enter SIR TOBY BELCH and FABIAN  SIR TOBY BELCH  Gentleman, God save thee. 

 VIOLA  And you, sir. 

 SIR TOBY BELCH  That defence thou hast, betake thee to't: of what 

 nature the wrongs are thou hast done him, I know 

 not; but thy intercepter, full of despite, bloody as 

 the hunter, attends thee at the orchard-end: 

 dismount thy tuck, be yare in thy preparation, for 

 thy assailant is quick, skilful and deadly. 

 VIOLA  You mistake, sir; I am sure no man hath any quarrel 

 to me: my remembrance is very free and clear from 

 any image of offence done to any man. 

 SIR TOBY BELCH  You'll find it otherwise, I assure you: therefore, 

 if you hold your life at any price, betake you to 

 your guard; for your opposite hath in him what 

 youth, strength, skill and wrath can furnish man withal. 

 VIOLA  I pray you, sir, what is he? 

 SIR TOBY BELCH  He is knight, dubbed with unhatched rapier and on 

 carpet consideration; but he is a devil in private 

 brawl: souls and bodies hath he divorced three; and 

 his incensement at this moment is so implacable, 

 that satisfaction can be none but by pangs of death 

 and sepulchre. Hob, nob, is his word; give't or take't. 

 VIOLA  I will return again into the house and desire some 

 conduct of the lady. I am no fighter. I have heard 

 of some kind of men that put quarrels purposely on 

 others, to taste their valour: belike this is a man 

 of that quirk. 

 SIR TOBY BELCH  Sir, no; his indignation derives itself out of a 

 very competent injury: therefore, get you on and 

 give him his desire. Back you shall not to the 

 house, unless you undertake that with me which with 

 as much safety you might answer him: therefore, on, 

 or strip your sword stark naked; for meddle you 

 must, that's certain, or forswear to wear iron about you. 

 VIOLA  This is as uncivil as strange. I beseech you, do me 

 this courteous office, as to know of the knight what 

 my offence to him is: it is something of my 

 negligence, nothing of my purpose. 

 SIR TOBY BELCH  I will do so. Signior Fabian, stay you by this 

 gentleman till my return. 



 Exit  VIOLA  Pray you, sir, do you know of this matter? 

 FABIAN  I know the knight is incensed against you, even to a 

 mortal arbitrement; but nothing of the circumstance more. 

 VIOLA  I beseech you, what manner of man is he? 

 FABIAN  Nothing of that wonderful promise, to read him by 

 his form, as you are like to find him in the proof 

 of his valour. He is, indeed, sir, the most skilful, 

 bloody and fatal opposite that you could possibly 

 have found in any part of Illyria. Will you walk 

 towards him? I will make your peace with him if I 

 can. 

 VIOLA  I shall be much bound to you for't: I am one that 

 had rather go with sir priest than sir knight: I 

 care not who knows so much of my mettle. 



 Exeunt 

 Re-enter SIR TOBY BELCH, with SIR ANDREW  SIR TOBY BELCH  Why, man, he's a very devil; I have not seen such a 

 firago. I had a pass with him, rapier, scabbard and 

 all, and he gives me the stuck in with such a mortal 

 motion, that it is inevitable; and on the answer, he 

 pays you as surely as your feet hit the ground they 

 step on. They say he has been fencer to the Sophy. 

 SIR ANDREW  Pox on't, I'll not meddle with him. 

 SIR TOBY BELCH  Ay, but he will not now be pacified: Fabian can 

 scarce hold him yonder. 

 SIR ANDREW  Plague on't, an I thought he had been valiant and so 

 cunning in fence, I'ld have seen him damned ere I'ld 

 have challenged him. Let him let the matter slip, 

 and I'll give him my horse, grey Capilet. 

 SIR TOBY BELCH  I'll make the motion: stand here, make a good show 

 on't: this shall end without the perdition of souls. 



 Aside  Marry, I'll ride your horse as well as I ride you. 



 Re-enter FABIAN and VIOLA 

 To FABIAN  I have his horse to take up the quarrel: 

 I have persuaded him the youth's a devil. 

 FABIAN  He is as horribly conceited of him; and pants and 

 looks pale, as if a bear were at his heels. 

 SIR TOBY BELCH  [To VIOLA]  There's no remedy, sir; he will fight 

 with you for's oath sake: marry, he hath better 

 bethought him of his quarrel, and he finds that now 

 scarce to be worth talking of: therefore draw, for 

 the supportance of his vow; he protests he will not hurt you. 

 VIOLA  [Aside]  Pray God defend me! A little thing would 

 make me tell them how much I lack of a man. 

 FABIAN  Give ground, if you see him furious. 

 SIR TOBY BELCH  Come, Sir Andrew, there's no remedy; the gentleman 

 will, for his honour's sake, have one bout with you; 

 he cannot by the duello avoid it: but he has 

 promised me, as he is a gentleman and a soldier, he 

 will not hurt you. Come on; to't. 

 SIR ANDREW  Pray God, he keep his oath! 

 VIOLA  I do assure you, 'tis against my will. 



 They draw 

 Enter ANTONIO  ANTONIO  Put up your sword. If this young gentleman 

 Have done offence, I take the fault on me: 

 If you offend him, I for him defy you. 

 SIR TOBY BELCH  You, sir! why, what are you? 

 ANTONIO  One, sir, that for his love dares yet do more 

 Than you have heard him brag to you he will. 

 SIR TOBY BELCH  Nay, if you be an undertaker, I am for you. 



 They draw 

 Enter Officers  FABIAN  O good Sir Toby, hold! here come the officers. 

 SIR TOBY BELCH  I'll be with you anon. 

 VIOLA  Pray, sir, put your sword up, if you please. 

 SIR ANDREW  Marry, will I, sir; and, for that I promised you, 

 I'll be as good as my word: he will bear you easily 

 and reins well. 

 First Officer  This is the man; do thy office. 

 Second Officer  Antonio, I arrest thee at the suit of Count Orsino. 

 ANTONIO  You do mistake me, sir. 

 First Officer  No, sir, no jot; I know your favour well, 

 Though now you have no sea-cap on your head. 

 Take him away: he knows I know him well. 

 ANTONIO  I must obey. 



 To VIOLA  This comes with seeking you: 

 But there's no remedy; I shall answer it. 

 What will you do, now my necessity 

 Makes me to ask you for my purse? It grieves me 

 Much more for what I cannot do for you 

 Than what befalls myself. You stand amazed; 

 But be of comfort. 

 Second Officer  Come, sir, away. 

 ANTONIO  I must entreat of you some of that money. 

 VIOLA  What money, sir? 

 For the fair kindness you have show'd me here, 

 And, part, being prompted by your present trouble, 

 Out of my lean and low ability 

 I'll lend you something: my having is not much; 

 I'll make division of my present with you: 

 Hold, there's half my coffer. 

 ANTONIO  Will you deny me now? 

 Is't possible that my deserts to you 

 Can lack persuasion? Do not tempt my misery, 

 Lest that it make me so unsound a man 

 As to upbraid you with those kindnesses 

 That I have done for you. 

 VIOLA  I know of none; 

 Nor know I you by voice or any feature: 

 I hate ingratitude more in a man 

 Than lying, vainness, babbling, drunkenness, 

 Or any taint of vice whose strong corruption 

 Inhabits our frail blood. 

 ANTONIO  O heavens themselves! 

 Second Officer  Come, sir, I pray you, go. 

 ANTONIO  Let me speak a little. This youth that you see here 

 I snatch'd one half out of the jaws of death, 

 Relieved him with such sanctity of love, 

 And to his image, which methought did promise 

 Most venerable worth, did I devotion. 

 First Officer  What's that to us? The time goes by: away! 

 ANTONIO  But O how vile an idol proves this god 

 Thou hast, Sebastian, done good feature shame. 

 In nature there's no blemish but the mind; 

 None can be call'd deform'd but the unkind: 

 Virtue is beauty, but the beauteous evil 

 Are empty trunks o'erflourish'd by the devil. 

 First Officer  The man grows mad: away with him! Come, come, sir. 

 ANTONIO  Lead me on. 



 Exit with Officers  VIOLA  Methinks his words do from such passion fly, 

 That he believes himself: so do not I. 

 Prove true, imagination, O, prove true, 

 That I, dear brother, be now ta'en for you! 

 SIR TOBY BELCH  Come hither, knight; come hither, Fabian: we'll 

 whisper o'er a couplet or two of most sage saws. 

 VIOLA  He named Sebastian: I my brother know 

 Yet living in my glass; even such and so 

 In favour was my brother, and he went 

 Still in this fashion, colour, ornament, 

 For him I imitate: O, if it prove, 

 Tempests are kind and salt waves fresh in love. 



 Exit  SIR TOBY BELCH  A very dishonest paltry boy, and more a coward than 

 a hare: his dishonesty appears in leaving his 

 friend here in necessity and denying him; and for 

 his cowardship, ask Fabian. 

 FABIAN  A coward, a most devout coward, religious in it. 

 SIR ANDREW  'Slid, I'll after him again and beat him. 

 SIR TOBY BELCH  Do; cuff him soundly, but never draw thy sword. 

 SIR ANDREW  An I do not,-- 

 FABIAN  Come, let's see the event. 

 SIR TOBY BELCH  I dare lay any money 'twill be nothing yet. 



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