SCENE I. Milan. The DUKE's palace. Two Gentlemen of Verona  Shakespeare homepage  |  Two Gentlemen of Verona  | Act 2, Scene 1 

 Previous scene  |  Next scene  SCENE I. Milan. The DUKE's palace. 

 Enter VALENTINE and SPEED  SPEED  Sir, your glove. 

 VALENTINE  Not mine; my gloves are on. 

 SPEED  Why, then, this may be yours, for this is but one. 

 VALENTINE  Ha! let me see: ay, give it me, it's mine: 

 Sweet ornament that decks a thing divine! 

 Ah, Silvia, Silvia! 

 SPEED  Madam Silvia! Madam Silvia! 

 VALENTINE  How now, sirrah? 

 SPEED  She is not within hearing, sir. 

 VALENTINE  Why, sir, who bade you call her? 

 SPEED  Your worship, sir; or else I mistook. 

 VALENTINE  Well, you'll still be too forward. 

 SPEED  And yet I was last chidden for being too slow. 

 VALENTINE  Go to, sir: tell me, do you know Madam Silvia? 

 SPEED  She that your worship loves? 

 VALENTINE  Why, how know you that I am in love? 

 SPEED  Marry, by these special marks: first, you have 

 learned, like Sir Proteus, to wreathe your arms, 

 like a malecontent; to relish a love-song, like a 

 robin-redbreast; to walk alone, like one that had 

 the pestilence; to sigh, like a school-boy that had 

 lost his A B C; to weep, like a young wench that had 

 buried her grandam; to fast, like one that takes 

 diet; to watch like one that fears robbing; to 

 speak puling, like a beggar at Hallowmas. You were 

 wont, when you laughed, to crow like a cock; when you 

 walked, to walk like one of the lions; when you 

 fasted, it was presently after dinner; when you 

 looked sadly, it was for want of money: and now you 

 are metamorphosed with a mistress, that, when I look 

 on you, I can hardly think you my master. 

 VALENTINE  Are all these things perceived in me? 

 SPEED  They are all perceived without ye. 

 VALENTINE  Without me? they cannot. 

 SPEED  Without you? nay, that's certain, for, without you 

 were so simple, none else would: but you are so 

 without these follies, that these follies are within 

 you and shine through you like the water in an 

 urinal, that not an eye that sees you but is a 

 physician to comment on your malady. 

 VALENTINE  But tell me, dost thou know my lady Silvia? 

 SPEED  She that you gaze on so as she sits at supper? 

 VALENTINE  Hast thou observed that? even she, I mean. 

 SPEED  Why, sir, I know her not. 

 VALENTINE  Dost thou know her by my gazing on her, and yet 

 knowest her not? 

 SPEED  Is she not hard-favoured, sir? 

 VALENTINE  Not so fair, boy, as well-favoured. 

 SPEED  Sir, I know that well enough. 

 VALENTINE  What dost thou know? 

 SPEED  That she is not so fair as, of you, well-favoured. 

 VALENTINE  I mean that her beauty is exquisite, but her favour infinite. 

 SPEED  That's because the one is painted and the other out 

 of all count. 

 VALENTINE  How painted? and how out of count? 

 SPEED  Marry, sir, so painted, to make her fair, that no 

 man counts of her beauty. 

 VALENTINE  How esteemest thou me? I account of her beauty. 

 SPEED  You never saw her since she was deformed. 

 VALENTINE  How long hath she been deformed? 

 SPEED  Ever since you loved her. 

 VALENTINE  I have loved her ever since I saw her; and still I 

 see her beautiful. 

 SPEED  If you love her, you cannot see her. 

 VALENTINE  Why? 

 SPEED  Because Love is blind. O, that you had mine eyes; 

 or your own eyes had the lights they were wont to 

 have when you chid at Sir Proteus for going 

 ungartered! 

 VALENTINE  What should I see then? 

 SPEED  Your own present folly and her passing deformity: 

 for he, being in love, could not see to garter his 

 hose, and you, being in love, cannot see to put on your hose. 

 VALENTINE  Belike, boy, then, you are in love; for last 

 morning you could not see to wipe my shoes. 

 SPEED  True, sir; I was in love with my bed: I thank you, 

 you swinged me for my love, which makes me the 

 bolder to chide you for yours. 

 VALENTINE  In conclusion, I stand affected to her. 

 SPEED  I would you were set, so your affection would cease. 

 VALENTINE  Last night she enjoined me to write some lines to 

 one she loves. 

 SPEED  And have you? 

 VALENTINE  I have. 

 SPEED  Are they not lamely writ? 

 VALENTINE  No, boy, but as well as I can do them. Peace! 

 here she comes. 

 SPEED  [Aside]  O excellent motion! O exceeding puppet! 

 Now will he interpret to her. 



 Enter SILVIA  VALENTINE  Madam and mistress, a thousand good-morrows. 

 SPEED  [Aside]  O, give ye good even! here's a million of manners. 

 SILVIA  Sir Valentine and servant, to you two thousand. 

 SPEED  [Aside]  He should give her interest and she gives it him. 

 VALENTINE  As you enjoin'd me, I have writ your letter 

 Unto the secret nameless friend of yours; 

 Which I was much unwilling to proceed in 

 But for my duty to your ladyship. 

 SILVIA  I thank you gentle servant: 'tis very clerkly done. 

 VALENTINE  Now trust me, madam, it came hardly off; 

 For being ignorant to whom it goes 

 I writ at random, very doubtfully. 

 SILVIA  Perchance you think too much of so much pains? 

 VALENTINE  No, madam; so it stead you, I will write 

 Please you command, a thousand times as much; And yet-- 

 SILVIA  A pretty period! Well, I guess the sequel; 

 And yet I will not name it; and yet I care not; 

 And yet take this again; and yet I thank you, 

 Meaning henceforth to trouble you no more. 

 SPEED  [Aside]  And yet you will; and yet another 'yet.' 

 VALENTINE  What means your ladyship? do you not like it? 

 SILVIA  Yes, yes; the lines are very quaintly writ; 

 But since unwillingly, take them again. 

 Nay, take them. 

 VALENTINE  Madam, they are for you. 

 SILVIA  Ay, ay: you writ them, sir, at my request; 

 But I will none of them; they are for you; 

 I would have had them writ more movingly. 

 VALENTINE  Please you, I'll write your ladyship another. 

 SILVIA  And when it's writ, for my sake read it over, 

 And if it please you, so; if not, why, so. 

 VALENTINE  If it please me, madam, what then? 

 SILVIA  Why, if it please you, take it for your labour: 

 And so, good morrow, servant. 



 Exit  SPEED  O jest unseen, inscrutable, invisible, 

 As a nose on a man's face, or a weathercock on a steeple! 

 My master sues to her, and she hath 

 taught her suitor, 

 He being her pupil, to become her tutor. 

 O excellent device! was there ever heard a better, 

 That my master, being scribe, to himself should write 

 the letter? 

 VALENTINE  How now, sir? what are you reasoning with yourself? 

 SPEED  Nay, I was rhyming: 'tis you that have the reason. 

 VALENTINE  To do what? 

 SPEED  To be a spokesman for Madam Silvia. 

 VALENTINE  To whom? 

 SPEED  To yourself: why, she wooes you by a figure. 

 VALENTINE  What figure? 

 SPEED  By a letter, I should say. 

 VALENTINE  Why, she hath not writ to me? 

 SPEED  What need she, when she hath made you write to 

 yourself? Why, do you not perceive the jest? 

 VALENTINE  No, believe me. 

 SPEED  No believing you, indeed, sir. But did you perceive 

 her earnest? 

 VALENTINE  She gave me none, except an angry word. 

 SPEED  Why, she hath given you a letter. 

 VALENTINE  That's the letter I writ to her friend. 

 SPEED  And that letter hath she delivered, and there an end. 

 VALENTINE  I would it were no worse. 

 SPEED  I'll warrant you, 'tis as well: 

 For often have you writ to her, and she, in modesty, 

 Or else for want of idle time, could not again reply; 

 Or fearing else some messenger that might her mind discover, 

 Herself hath taught her love himself to write unto her lover. 

 All this I speak in print, for in print I found it. 

 Why muse you, sir? 'tis dinner-time. 

 VALENTINE  I have dined. 

 SPEED  Ay, but hearken, sir; though the chameleon Love can 

 feed on the air, I am one that am nourished by my 

 victuals, and would fain have meat. O, be not like 

 your mistress; be moved, be moved. 



 Exeunt  Shakespeare homepage  |  Two Gentlemen of Verona  | Act 2, Scene 1 

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